Seeing the World Through Single-dom

I will be writing more about my journey but I wanted to make sure I sent a quick update. Thank you for the kind words and calls. Here we go...


Health Condition Reveal
Today I underwent  surgery today on both eyes for adult strabismus.  

(... which Is???)
There are a lot of words interchanged for what it really is but essentially it’s the misalignment of the eyes affecting about  4% of the US population . For me, one eye would focus  in one direction, the other in the other direction, I work really hard to pick the most consistent image and go with that one. It’s a moment by moment game  your mind plays  with h every single piece of stimulus. 


Every. 
single.
day.
After 35 years , game over. 



Whether your eyes turn out or in  or both , it creates a situation where you see double And your mind and body are working overtime all the time.. 
Examples are endless so for context  I’d have you Journey with me! 

You start you new day like this: 
◦ Multi  Wake Up Alarms:   You wake up and reach for your alarm clock kind of miss it because you have no depth perception. 
◦ Coffee Part 1:You go to make coffee and have to stand really really close and make sure it’s properly aligned or your coffee goes to the grate
◦ Coffee Part 2:  When you add sugar to coffee ,as usual  you  always miss the top of the cup just a bit  so you clean up the sugary counter 
◦ Ziptie Considerations, Sunglasses or Squint?  So  you go outside and put on Sunglasses but then you realize it’s not gonna work out, (Seeing double in the sun is no Bueno) so you stack your sunglasses  Over  huge prism glasses and it’s just more of a hindrance. And depending on how much prism ?  We may not be able to get the Glasses that switch from Mike to daytime, and if you do your glasses are going to go from approximately $475 to closer to $700. ...Just in case the stacking of sunglasses sounds silly…You even consider zip tying them together but that looks  stupid so you commute for an hour with  a squint  and Total anxiety, because The sun only makes the double vision more complicated and  commuting just a little bit more miserable
◦ Parking Garage  Complications : Getting into the private  garage at work, you usually either come super close to the badge in/ badge out area or end up super far away to where you have to open the door and reach because you didn’t really know how close your car wise to the badging area. There is occasional embarrassment to win because you can’t quite judge depth, your coworkers will see you having to get out of the car to reach  forward a couple of inches in order to use your . Badge .. like every other week  
◦ Prayers in the Parking Process: To   park your car you squint and pray to God that this is a good eye today and that you don’t scrape any cars that you are parking in between. 
◦ Walking the Dreaded Mile  - You appear antisocial But what you really are is trying to avoid overstimulation, as well as people finding out that you’re goingseeing your whole world twice, simultaneously , including them.  I personally off to finish up my Audible with earphones in so I can give a quick hello versus an impromptu conversation where my eyes me wonder and I will fill in barest and or be percei. ved as being deceptive or disinterested. .
◦ Work Arrival!  Now at  your desk, your eyes are adjusting to the new artificial light up above Throughout the building, and when you sit, you’re adjusting anywhere from 1 to 3 different ddin the resolution and hoping it’s a good idea so you’re not seeing 2 to 6 screens and all of the open applications in  double form. 
◦ Prayers: Quick prayer of both gratitude for making it to work on time, and hopefulness to avoid embarrassing meetings or situations or perceived disinterest, 
... And did I mention, . It is now 8 AM.

Excited about my new adventure and excited to compare and contrast the different experiences that having new site should bring. I am so grateful to pediatric eye care specialist at Fort Worth into Dr. Alan  Norman who  has working with me for almost 2 years to just buck  up and get it done! 
*This was pre-written, my eyes hurt I’m going to bed :-)*


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ongoing Lessons in Life and BALANCE

Image
Hi My name is Jessica and I’m admittedly diagnosed with  ADHD. Watching my feed it’s like, “right. was there a question? You randomly dress in tutus”  However, I’ve always been more than functional with this, but sometimes, or rather for me, one time, it got to be more than I could bear. It takes a transition to get you to re-think and reassess how you approach things and how you react to changes and issues that come about. This is the longest post ever but here we go... The Background  I’m a middle child.    Middle child syndrome set in long ago and I’m definitely a people pleaser, mediator if you will. I love it and sometimes hate it.    I want to be mediated on once in a while! Can someone sorta let me just BE there and NOT be involved in the resolution? The answer is usually no.   Pressing on, I got married a little young, 23 to be exact and proceeded into full Stepmom (two amazing kiddos), wife, worker, grad student, gym go...
Read more

Divorce diaries

Image
 this will be a shorter sort of rambling entry. It all matters. With my ex and I called it off, I put up a huge wall and that wall translated into every part of the life I have with my daughter. As much as I thought it didn't matter, kindergarten has been kicking my ass. You read that right my ass. All of it. And I have a big one. And why? Because of that damn wall. We weren't talking. So House on the right didn't know what house on the left was dealing with. It was pretty much awful. But I have seen though is my daughter be someone I didn't know she was, and show me that she's 100 times smarter and more clever than I ever gave her a little clever but credit for. So the diary of a divorcee  starts here…this is the lesson. They're smarter than us. So you got to talk. Kindergarten is getting a little better, actually a lot better. Who the heck learns Mandarin and Spanish , before they get there for teeth? And oh gosh the front teeth. That's another entry 😜… B...
Read more

day one...ick

so basically, im a little dissappointed..but ill get to that... i have reached a BLAH state with my workouts and yo-yo weight issues so i decided to try Jay Johnson's bootcamp. I thought, hey, it works for cheerleaders, surely I can hang! I was so nervous!! I went out...spent $225 on the camp and ended up buying new workout clothes and shoes and sweats (geez, you cant just roll into valley ranch looking like trash right?!?!?) and i was ready this morning..queeziness and all...530am..i got there at 520a (10 push ups if you are late!!) and you know what???? it was cancelled! more specifically, no one showed! so im still pretty ticked about it!! i actually am actively trying to reach the caloric goals for each day, so i packed my 4-5 mini meals and im doing ok..i ended up doing some workout at the gym and i ran and such outside with some veterans of the camp before dissapointedly departing the location... lets just say that im overly ready for wednesday and i hope i dont have to get a...
Read more